Understanding autistic identity

Autistic identity plays a big role in the lives of many people in the autism community, shaping how they see themselves and how they connect with the world around them. 

It's important for everyone to choose how they identify and the words they use to describe themselves. This choice helps them stay true to their values, feel more confident, and express who they are. Below we explore what autistic identity means, look at it from both personal and community perspectives and discuss how language plays an important role when discussing autistic identity. 

Personal and community identity

The importance of personal choice

The way individuals choose to describe themselves can greatly influence their sense of self and integrity. For many in the autistic community, identifying as autistic is a matter of pride and authenticity. It reflects their unique thought processes, how they perceive the world, and their emotions—integral parts inseparable from their identity. Autism shapes their way of thinking and feeling.

Views on identity can vary, particularly between individuals and communities. Some people prefer to use ‘person-first’ language, such as ‘has autism’ or ‘with autism’. They believe that their identity as a person is more important than their condition. This is also common among non-autistic people, especially parents/carers

Although there is no right or wrong way, using language that someone dislikes can be seen as insensitive or offensive. It is best to ask people about their personal preferences whenever possible.

Marginalisation and empowerment

Groups historically marginalised, such as people with a disability, neurodivergent people, ethnic minorities, and the LGBTQIA+ community, often find strength in embracing their unique identities. Feeling like you belong and are seen makes a big difference in getting everyone to embrace diversity. Still, the worry about being judged can make some people cautious about showing their true selves, scared they'll be viewed as less. 

Understanding autism as a neurodevelopmental difference is important. It's not something that needs fixing. It's a unique way of experiencing the world that deserves respect and support. Whether someone decides to openly identify as autistic or not, it's crucial to respect their decision, especially if it's shaped by personal challenges or societal barriers.

Current terminology and language use

Identity-first vs. person-first language

The debate between 'identity-first' (e.g., autistic person) and 'person-first' (e.g., person with autism) language is ongoing within the autism community. Many support identity-first language as a form of empowerment, highlighting the integral role of autism in their identity. There is no right or wrong choice; it’s personal and preferences vary widely. Respecting each individual's choice once they express it is the best approach.

Gender identification and pronouns

It’s important to recognise and respect each person’s gender identification and chosen pronouns. Mistakes can happen, but it is important to acknowledge these and continue to use the correct pronouns as specified by the person.

Diagnostic terminology

'Autism Spectrum Disorder' (ASD) remains the standard terminology for academic and diagnostic purposes, It’s generally used in clinical or research settings and not as a label for individuals. The term 'Asperger Syndrome' is no longer used in many diagnostic manuals but is still chosen by some for self-identification.

Moving beyond misleading labels

Terms like 'high-functioning' and 'low-functioning' are increasingly seen as misleading and divisive. It is more helpful to talk about an individual's specific needs or traits, such as their support requirements or communication styles, rather than using broad labels.‍

Having a strengths-based approach

Adopting a strengths-based approach when talking about autism means focusing on the abilities and potential of autistic individuals rather than on deficits. Some examples include:

• Using neutral or positive terms to describe autistic traits, such as 'communication differences' rather than 'deficits'.
• Avoiding terms like 'suffering from autism', which implies hardship.
• Using 'co-occurring' instead of 'co-morbid' to describe additional conditions.

The way we talk about autistic identity is crucial—it’s about respect, recognition, and rights. As our understanding evolves, so does our language on how to discuss and describe autism. By being respectful and empowering language, we can better support autistic individuals in expressing their identities authentically. ‍

Developing self identity

Forming a self-identity during the teenage years is all about figuring out who you are, what you stand for, and what you like. This is important for all young people, but autistic teenagers often find it a bit trickier. 

For many autistic teenagers, understanding and managing emotions doesn't always come easily. This can make it harder for them to work out how they feel about themselves and their views on various topics. Building a stable sense of self is difficult when emotions feel confusing or overwhelming.

Social situations also play a big part in shaping who we are. Autistic teens might find these interactions more challenging. They may feel unsure about where they fit in with their peers, notice differences more acutely, or simply not be as interested in socialising. This can lead to feeling left out and make it harder to form a clear self-identity.

Teen years are also full of changes—body changes, emotional shifts, and different social expectations. For autistic teenagers, these changes might seem more intense or harder to predict, adding to the challenge of figuring out who they are.

Practical ways to help build self-identity

Helping an autistic teenager develop a strong sense of self requires some practical steps focusing on their emotional and social needs. Here are several useful approaches:

Talk about diversity

One simple but effective strategy is to have open conversations about diversity. Highlighting that everyone has their own unique strengths, interests, and challenges can help autistic teens see their own value. Pointing out that it’s perfectly normal for people to look, think, or act differently can boost their confidence.‍

Encourage social participation

‍Engaging in activities that they enjoy can make a significant difference. Whether it’s joining a sports team, a music group, or a club related to a hobby, these activities help autistic teens discover what they’re good at and where they fit in. They also get a chance to practice social skills in a friendly setting. Spending time with other autistic teens can be particularly valuable. It helps them learn more about autism and connect to others with similar experiences. Local social groups or online groups can be great places to start.‍

Personal reflection

‍Encouraging teens to think about what they like and don’t like, and how they see themselves can build self-awareness. Looking at photos, lists of their interests, and achievements that remind them of who they are and what matters to them.‍

Find supportive communities

It is incredibly important to help teens find a group—often called finding their 'tribe'—where they feel accepted and valued. Whether it’s through shared interests in specific subjects, sports, or creative activities, being part of a group can help build their confidence and sense of identity.